Sitting here, just waiting,
the thoughts come again.
Am I so wrong?
Too demanding of speed
from a logjammed society?
The answer is probably
a firm, shouted yes.
Look through my eyes,
and that answer changes.

Four long, damned years
tint my strong views
on Society, Life, Fate
and many other things.
Eight Thousand plus applications
for jobs never gained,
roadblocks tossed before me
on alternate monetary paths.
Judge me not harshly.

I've taken my licks,
been kicked aside often,
and yet I rose,
dusted myself off brazenly
or tentatively, few times,
and dove back in,
to get my punches
tossed into the fray
my life has become.

Now, tossing in towel,
not just threatening it,
everyone seems so disgusted
but fails to see
my spirit is spent.
I've tried it all,
lied in those interviews
saying I would change
or told honest truths.

Few see my soul,
a barren desert landscape,
parched for some reward,
financial, spiritual, or other.
Instead they see "Quitter",
where really, there lies
a fighter who just
needs time to rest.
Free of any burdens.

So, enjoy the tales,
share poems you like
even after I'm gone.
Support those I followed,
offer a hand gently
to those still panhandling
and realize the truth.
There are two sides
to everyone's life story.

Now, I've got a tomato to eat,
so leave me in peace, smoking my pipe...
as I regroup and regenerate.

17September2014 - Dyfedd Rex